Trauma, Behaviour and Communication

I recently attended a reunion with my old form class who I had pastorally led throughout the majority of their school time.  I found it so interesting to see what they were all doing now, but also that although when these kids were in my form class I was at an early point in my teaching career and was quite naive to trauma,  I still had a deep sixth sense which told me how each of these children would turn out.  This 'sense' was based on an intuition that was provided through the child's behaviour in my class.  There were some kids that were great communicators and had ambitions and ideas about what they wanted to do when they left school; they had direction and most likely parents who supported them with advice and guidance.  Some of the other children were angry and were vulnerable/lacking self-confidence and there was a clear link between this behaviour and poor exam results/outcomes.  Had these kid suffered trauma? The students were successful regardless of whether they had been particularly academic or not. They had succeeded in their adult life as they were confident, happy and communicative. Some had gone into vocational work and were doing really well.  Others had gone into the corporate world and these were mostly students who had gone to university. The students who had presented with severe behavioural issues didn't attend the reunion.  If I could 'sense' this when these kids were so young, did I let them down by not intervening early enough?  I felt accountable even though these people where now in their mid 20's.

As I have progressed throughout my career, dealing with children who have suffered childhood trauma has become an area of expertise for me and as I learnt more about behaviour being linked to trauma, so much became clear for me.  Not only for the children I teach year on year, but for myself and my family.  I find that I constantly analyse behaviour and try to read why people act the way they do.  More than often if I can dig deep enough I can  find the catalyst, and more than often it is childhood trauma or a traumatic experience.

So what is childhood trauma?  Trauma is a word that suggests a negative experience that 'scars' a person and which is then carried with them throughout their future lives.  Some links in behaviour are obvious, such as attachment. For example, a child who has been severed from primary care givers at a young age, finds it difficult to form positive relationships and trust as they grow up to adulthood.  

When a child 'misbehaves' in my class, I always think to myself "what is this child trying to communicate to me?" I try to 'read' them and interpret the behaviour into a language which I can understand.  I do the same with adults I encounter also.  When I see adults speaking in a particular way to someone in public or in the workplace, I am constantly making links to whether it's childhood trauma or general trauma that has made them react that way.  Before I set up Probehaviours, I would consider, can this be changed?  Trauma doesn't define someone, and change can happen. Someone who wants to proactively change the way they communicate, can do so!

This is probably why I have set up this company....I want to be able to help people communicate effectively and confidently to get the best outcomes they want, but to also recognise that trauma doesn't mean you can't change the way you communicate, or lead, or manage or teach!